shane 08 : political appointments

Seems this is the most popular subject to arise from my previous announcement of intent to run for President, so it's a good place to begin revealing my platform and positions on various subjects.

The question with appointments invariably boils down to the issue of nepotism/cronyism. Will I, as President of these United States of America fill positions in the Federal Government with my friends and family?

Duh. Of course I will. This is, after all, politics. I have to get elected, and in doing so, I have to remember and reward those who are faithful to that cause.

However, don't confuse my openness to help out my friends and family with plush federal employment with a lack of care for this country nor a lack of understanding as to their abilities or the needs and qualifications of the positions being filled. I'm not about to turn this country in to the mockery of democracy, as seen in the movie Idiocracy where the House of Representatives becomes the House o' Representin'.

Will I set my friend Adam up as the Secretary of Defense as he has requested (in his words : "so I can bomb the hell out of some country...")? No. Not on your life. I do think Adam is quite capable, however, so I've offered him a position as the head of the IRS.

Will I make my Uncle Secretary of State? No. I think Rice is doing a fine job and is way more qualified. My uncle, however, would make a great head of the Department of the Interior.

Will I make my friend Phil my VP? No. I figure, as unknown as I am, I'll need a nationally recognized heavy hitter as my wing man. (I'm thinking Fred Thompson, but he's not returned my calls as of yet.) However, Phil would make a great Director of NASA. (I'd save that position for Frank J., but he'd just spend all his time trying to get a nuke to the moon.)

Here's the bottom line, the bit for the sound bite obsessed media: Important Cabinet-level positions will be filled with people who know what they're doing. Smaller bureaucratic positions will be filled by friends and family, mainly because I can trust them to carry out my instructions to close down their respective departments by the time my second term ends.

oops...

So now Google thinks I'm a no good, dirty, rotten, low down spammer and have locked my account from sending. I sent the announcement about the previous post to everyone in my contact list, generating a lot of those "address not found" replies from all of the dead email addresses.

Opps.

So all of you who have written me back, I promise I've actually written a response (to some of you) but I can only save them as a draft. Hopefully they'll have me unblocked by tomorrow.

Sorry.

time to start a revolution...

So. Here it is. The day has finally arrived. I'm 35.

Most people don't count 35 among the milestones of birthdays. 16 you drive. 18 you vote. 21 you drink (legally speaking.) 25 you pay less for car insurance. These are then followed by the succession of '0 birthdays to mark the remaining decades of our lives. These are the typical recognized demarcations of the American individual.

Me? I've never been typical, have I?

No person except a natural born Citizen, or a Citizen of the United States, at the time of the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the Office of President; neither shall any Person be eligible to that Office who shall not have attained to the Age of thirty-five Years, and been fourteen Years a Resident within the United States.

That's right folks. Today is the day I officially become eligible for the office of President of the United States of America. Where do I sign up to get on the ballots?

No. Seriously, does anyone know how to get on the ballots?


** Details of my platform and stance on various issues will follow in the coming days...